It’s
got a bit of a sketchy rep has Morrison’s. Always the theta supermarket to
Waitrose’s alpha and Tesco’s beta, always finishing last in the food supplements’
product comparisons; on top of which it insists on hiring cack ‘celebrities’
to promote its brand: Richard Hammond, Alan Hansen – it’s as if they want to
fail.
Then
there’s the stores themselves. Sometimes you’ll find a nice one. The one in
Letchworth is verging on posh, but my local one
in Stamford Hill, north London, could on certain days be mistaken for a
medieval cattle auction.
In
spite of all of this, I like Morrisons. It’s relatively cheap, and when I moved
to where I live now I would regularly buy wine there. It was, occasionally, quite
good – I liked the mid-range pinot noir particularly – but more often than not
what you would expect: tedious, middle-of-the-road, Richard Hammond sorts of
wine.
Now, along
with every other British supermarket, Morrisons has realised that the average wine drinker is becoming more savvy and demanding, and that it has to up its game. Even the casual guzzler of Saturday night plonk in front of the
telly is growing weary of that flabby fruit-bomb Jacob’s Creek. He/she (for they are a hermaphrodite) wants
something new, intriguing, pizzazzy.
So when
the invitation to the tasting for the Morrisons wine range relaunch dropped in
my inbox, rather than guffaw loudly and expedite it to my trash, I
said I’d be happy to attend and duly paid a visit.
The
verdict? Well, the wine bods at Waitrose are hardly going to be soiling
themselves, but there are definitely
decent everyday-drinking bottles to be found among the 148-bottle range
(three-quarters of which are totally new).
What’s
also good is that they’ve made it super-easy for uninitiated wine drinkers to work out what they like – by introducing fool-proof labelling, QR codes and a
very simple three-question Taste Test to help define which wine they might
prefer (at the moment you can use it online at, but it should be in selected
stores in the near future). I tried the Taste Test and it was pretty accurate,
actually.
So,
if you’re going to Morrisons, my guidance, based on an heroic tasting of most
of the 148 bottles in the range, is as follows:
1) Avoid
the entry-level stuff, the bottles for less than a fiver: yes, it’s
inoffensive but there really is nothing to it. Buy it if you need a bottle to
cook with.
2)
Avoid the champagne. It tastes overwhelmingly of under-ripe rhubarb and is guaranteed to
dampen the celebration you bought it for.
3) Similarly,
if Rioja or Pouilly Fumé are to your taste, you’ll find far better ones elsewhere.
(I’ve had just about as much nauseatingly oaky corner shop-quality Rioja as I can
drink.)
With
those negatives out of the way, here are my top five highlight of the
Morrison’s Signature wine range (the level up from basic): all under a tenner
and won’t let you down when the big M is your best booze option.
1: Morrisons Signature
Saint Véran (£8.99)
100% Burgundian
chardonnay aged on the lees. Clean, citrusy, with a hint of richness. Will make
any white fish and buttery sauce combo literally sing. Well, literally as in
not really...
2: Morrisons Signature
Chablis (£9.99)
It’s nice to check in
with a cool, sharp Chablis every now and again, and this perfectly palatable
one will save you a couple of quid.
3: Morrisons Signature Barbera
d'Asti (£7.99)
100% barbera – perfect
for those vegetative nights in with a pizza, a jazz woodbine and exquisitely shit TV (eg, Surprise, Surprise).
4: Morrisons Signature
AOC Pic St Loup (£8.99)
A mildly spicy
syrah/grenache blend from one of the Languedoc’s top AOCs. I’m biased towards
the Languedoc because I 'did' a harvest there and once cycled down the Canal du Midi, but for value this is my pick of the bunch.
5: Morrisons Signature Carmenère
(£7.99)
A wild yeast-fermented
wine in Morrisons. How about that? Full of warm, dark-fruit flavour to get you through a pointlessly cold
and dark winter’s eve.
Now fuck off.
Now fuck off.
